"Phil treats nickels like manhole covers, believe me I know." - Johnny Sack

"You know my father would love to have you there. He's crazy about your sausages." - Carmela

"Fuckin little Carmine. Givin away washers." - Johnny Sack

"It's a surprise party, Jun. " - Bobby Bacala

"What are we, children? Anyway at our age it's enough surprise we're still alive every morning. " - Uncle Junior

"I'd love to be at your jubilee, but the Federal government says I can't leave the house, and my family keeps me sedated. " - Uncle Junior

"To think. When I got out of the joint, I thought an airbag was Paulie Walnuts." - Tony Blundetto

"She of the five page Christmas card...'and then on Flag Day, Grandpa Russ shook hands with Andrew Cuomo...what an honor.' BFD." - Carmela

"When we were kids in the Navy, he had such a bad case of crabs, we used to call him the governor of Maryland." - Hugh

"A doctor in the house, huh? That's good because somebody usually goes down at these things. " - Tony at Hugh's party